Alaska and the Yukon
with Archers Holiday, May 2016
Day 1: United Kingdom to Anchorage, Alaska
Well, so much for setting the alarm! Instead of 4.45am my useless assistant set it for 5.45am...sheesh the taxi to the airport was due at 6am! Fortunately the Ancient Assistant called at 5.15am, so we were up and ready when the taxi arrived. Just.
We (me, together with assistants Di, Paul and reluctant assistant Dave) were at Birmingham Airport in no time. There was a nice chap at check-in asking about me. I explained about Twitter teds. We got our boarding passes and breezed through security without a single bag being pulled, which is quite a novelty. In the No.1 Lounge we had breakfast, porridge, eggs benedict and my assistant Di ordered white toast (they'd run out!) so switched to wholemeal toast (which had barely seen the toaster), as well as cheese and biscuits. It seems Theo and Frank - who weren't supposed to be coming - had stowed away in the bag as they emerged when we arrived at the Lounge. Theo said stowing away deserved a beer, so we got him a small one. An Estrella Damm.
We headed for the gate and our luck ran out. Di got pulled for an additional security check. That was ten minutes of emptied bags, shoes off, bears groped, etc. The security chap was particularly interested in my strong abs, or more accurately, my harness. Finally we were able to board the plane.
We left pretty much on time so I checked out the movies. Ooh, Star Wars: The Force Awakens. I'd finally see it! It was great! Well, mostly, I take issue with a couple of bits but I won't spoil it if you haven't seen it. It was very much in the style of episode IV and it was great to see the old (and I mean old familiar faces). Theo was able to snag himself a Goose Island IPA and I got a Heineken.
Dinner (at 10am) wasn't thrilling. Cheese spread and crackers, pasta with orange couscous (no, I didn't eat it) and the usual rubber roll. The Loseley Strawberries and Cream after was good enough to wake Frank up from his nap. After Star Wars VII, I watched The Good Dinosaur. I'd seen the stuffies in the Disney Store but didn't know the movie at all. It was cute.
We were soon just an hour out of New Jersey and they came round with the usual turkey and cheese roll (Asst D usually has to remove the turkey) but this time they had a cheese roll! Wowee, progress for a change. Soon we were on the ground.
We have Global Entry so got through immigration without any problems, however our bags took forever to arrive. Still, once they did we got through security and onto the AirTrain. Sadly Di did not get TSA Precheck today so we had to do full security which is not much fun. Then her laptop was pulled for a swab too. Not her best day through the airports, but could be worse. At least I didn't get groped this time!
We tried to find some basic food for the ongoing domestic flights as it's not provided. Unfortunately, it was all pretty pretentious, inedible, flouncy food in the new food outlets at Newark Airport. The only veggie sandwich we found was chilli tofu - I don't think so! Bleagghhhh!!! Dave did get a sandwich though - he had to order it on a tablet, then pay for it on a machine before picking up at the counter. Talk about cutting staff! The line for the paying machine was long as folks figured out it didn't take cash. Not impressed Newark Airport. You might be having to provide more healthy food but no fries or pizza? This is not progress.
Empty-pawed, we headed to the United Club. The food selection here left a lot to be desired too. Only one type of cheese (with peppers - yuck), stale rolls, hummus (is it? orangey slime?) and chocolate pretzels (the hard kind - I'm not keen). Where are my cheese and biscuits and trail mixy-type stuff? Flamin' healthy eating. On the plus side, we got a pint of beer instead of the usual third, but on the downside, it was a Coors Light. Not the best, but free so not bad! Well, Theo thought so - he has no shame.
We headed to the boarding gate for our flight to Chicago. The next connection was pretty tight - around ninety minute - but we hoped we'd make it okay. The second leg was a short flight - less than two hours - so just time for a nap! The plane had come from Manchester earlier that morning so it had free entertainment but it wasn't a long enough flight for a movie so I couldn't be bothered to watch. The flight was uneventful. We were given free spicy Asian snacks and the nice flight attendant asked if the assistant wanted some for "the bear" - oh yes, "the bear" would definitely like some. We also got a full can of Coke.
We arrived early into Chicago, which was great. I recognised it from the air as we'd visited Chicago last year on our Route 66 tour. We landed and parked at Gate C23 when we were leaving from C19! The United Club was nearby too and we had to pass Auntie Anne's pretzel store. Great stuff.
The Chicago Club was very nice - recently upgraded apparently. There was lots of room, a nice bar with proper glasses of good red wine (well, it tasted good to me!) There was a better food selection here too, with three types of cheese, stale rolls (argh!), salad (yuck!), salami, two types of soup - mushroom brie and bizarrely chicken korma chowder (what the heck is that?)
At 5pm, we headed for the next flight. This one was six hours and we would arrive in Alaska at 9.30pm local time (6.30am in the UK - ew! Long day!) We boarded and as Dave was booked into peasant class for this we were hopeful for a seat for bears - success! We were a few minutes late leaving. I think the taxiway needs resurfacing as we *bump ~ bump ~ bumped* along.
On board, we got a Coke and a small packet of ranch snack mix. Woohoo - we know how to live. I also ate one of my two pretzels. It was a long, boring flight. I watched some Dancing With The Stars, worked on my website, napped. They were a bit stingy on the drinks for a six hour flight - a can of Coke and then an additional cup. That was a bit weak!
When we arrived at Anchorage Airport and picked up our bags at baggage claim, we noticed Dave's bag had been torn open on the front pocket. We took it straight to the United Airlines baggage office where we were told - in no uncertain terms - that they could not deal with a torn bag at the office and we would have to complete a claim form online. We assumed she knew what she was talking about and headed to the Ground Transportation area where we found the phones to call the hotel for the Airport Shuttle.
Anchorage has a nice airport with a huge stuffed moose to welcome us. Theo found Humpy's Alehouse next to our arrival gate - we had to tell him we'd stop there on the way back as it was late and we wanted to get to the hotel. From the Baggage Area, we called the hotel and a nice lady who anwered the phone said she would be twenty minutes and to wait outside. We left the building and into the light, sunny evening - it was 9.30pm! Warmer than we expected too. Soon the minibus arrived and we piled aboard.
It took about twenty minutes to arrive at our hotel, the Ramada Downtown Anchorage, our home for the next two nights. Another chap was on the shuttle with us and it took the Receptionist an age to get him his room keys then it was our turn. They had Di and Dave together, of course, their last names being the same. Heck, we've only been with Archers maybe twelve times, when will they get this right? At least this year we were mostly expected. They claimed to only have the one room so we mused about the problem and asked if Paul Maple had a room booked. "Yes," the lady replied, "but he hasn't checked in yet." Go figure! "This is him," my trusty asst advised. So, all was clear - Dave would have Paul's single room and Di, Paul and teds would get the double.
After we'd been in the room for a few minutes, we realised we couldn't open the bathroom door. We called maintenance and guy with a phone turned up. After fiddling with the handle and a paperclip, he eventually got the door open. Not knowing if this would happen again, we asked for an alternative room. Relatively painlessly, we moved to room 319 from 324. This was slightly better insofar as the bathroom door now opened, but the bed skirt was torn, the skirting heating was hanging off the wall and the desk chair was really very badly stained. We no longer had a balcony but we did have a better view of the mountains rather than the parking lot. This was okay, with two beds, microwave, fridge, coffee machine, 32-inch flatscreen TV and toiletries in the bathroom. Ah well, the sheets were clean and there was a bed for bears and a bed for humans so not a total loss. At least the Wi-Fi worked. Most of the time.
We decided to call it a night at 1am...or 10am UK time, considering we had left at 6am the previous day. As we only had basic plans for the next day we set ourselves a 9am start.